By Shrief Fadl Tell me a little about yourself
which self?
how little?
the self that sits before me,
your favorite self, if you have one
the one you plan on wearing
most days
Oh, he’s a real go getter
he goes and he gets, and he forgets
his family and friends and fortunes
so dedicated is he as an employee
he finds the profit motive as motivating
as avoiding certain destitution and death
Where do you see
yourself in 25 years?
I’m barely here as it is I can’t
imagine insisting on existing
for much longer, where do I see myself
other than in the past? Isn’t the future
a picture that failed to load?
How about ambitions?
Ambitions are superstitions
dressed up in business casual
Then what do you want?
Money
What do you really want?
More money
No, what do you really want
Nothing.
What?
The Buddha would be impressed
at my complete lack of yearning
And are you impressed?
With the lack of wanting
comes a lack of everything else
So why do you want this job?
Does a twig ask the current where it’s going?
No.
Does the debris decide where the tornado blows?
No.
Well then, there you go.
But are you a twig?
No.
And are you debris?
No.
But I sure wish
hope and pray to be
I thought you didn’t wish for
anything?
I only hunger for hunger
for an absence, a missing tooth
your tongue never forgets. Like a cave
that carves itself a rock and walks out
I wish to find an absence somewhere
with the shape of myself.
About the Author:
Shrief Fadl is a 35-year-old Egyptian writer, currently living in Vancouver, BC. Before he came to live in Canada, he was born and raised in Kuwait, studied in Lebanon and worked in Dubai, Doha, Abu Dhabi, and Cairo. His first poem is due to be published in April by the Sunflower Station Press based in Los Angeles. He also had my first play reading last year with Blackout Theatre in North Vancouver, BC.
I hope this poem becomes a scene in another dramatic production, either stage or radiodrama.